Life on a Turd
You probably think it absurd
That I float
around on a Turd
I’ve lived on it since a small lad
It’s the only home that I have
My mother was drinking and merry
She dropped me when boarding a ferry
A starfish grabbed hold of my ankle
He pushed me back up and I thanked him
I jumped on the first thing that saved me
A Turd floating by in The Mersey
There are times when you just can’t be fussy
I live off old pieces of chicken
Junk food and fish from the chippy
Whatever that floats in a carton
It's mine and nobody elses
My clothing is made from old Echo’s
People’s trousers and trainers
At Christmas discarded old crackers
In summer I search rocks for packets
I find old ice cream and yogurts
The Turd it has grown by the years
Attached to the old cans of beer
Clothes pegs and plastic pieces
It’s nice at this time of the season
The party’s and lights different colours
People discard tasty rubbish
Clothing that keeps me all cosy
Summer is just round the corner
The weather is hotter and warmer
Goodies from beach folk and shipping
Amazing books I am reading
Novels and notes say their leaving
To partners jealous and seething
Bin bags full of old photos
Of people no longer cared for
Big ships are sailing the river
They stop for a refuel and later
They see me and throw me a pickle
Some champagne or grilled lobster pieces
They can’t understand why I live here
My life is uncluttered and simple
No telephone lap top or mobile
The tides are all that I live by
The stars and the lights from the shipping
Crabs on the ebb tide I’m eating
The Councils from both sides all know me
They offer me clothing and money
I don’t need a thing I will tell them
Just leave me alone with my lifestyle
With old food and junk from the people
I’ve been sixty years on this river
Never had brothers nor sisters
Uncle’s kids and no mother
Friends or relations to love me
Just seagulls that hover above me
Everyone wouldn’t approach me
The smell is too rancid and sickly
From years eating crap on The Mersey
My skin is all wrinkled and crinkly
The salt in my skin is still with me
I’ll die with my Turd wrapped around me.
By Kevin Humphreys
11th December 2010
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